Monday, October 12, 2015

How frequently you utter " I love myself?"




People very often say, “I love you.” Is it possible to change this habit to say more frequently “I love myself”?  Prima-facie, one may be surprised to note how it is possible that a person does not love himself?  But this is a fact.  If we all love ourselves first as we try to love others, we would have not lived in a situation of violence and utter chaotic. Today, we live in an environment of increasing quarrelsome where most of us have less trust on the other persons. Sometimes, these other persons include the parents, close family members, bosoms and next door neighbors.  A majority of us are always in the midst of attacking our  own mind, body and  consciousness. Take the behavioral pattern of a child. He hits himself with his small hands when his demand is not fulfilled. No sooner, his demand is met, he stops this activity.  At this  small age, he knows how to incite violence to fulfill his demand.  In similar way, a youth takes drugs to stimulate his body to look attractive, a professional engages in all types of office politics with one of his close colleagues, so that he  gets promotion, an addict can refuse to quit drinking even though he is aware of the consequences, a severe diabetic may not leave sweets knowing fully well the same is harmful, a mother-in-law is doing rough and shoddy treatment to her daughter-in-law for dowry though in the society meeting, she is the first person to protest  against this dowry system. All these behavioral patterns show that we like to remain in violent though outwardly we show our magnanimity. Because of this tendency, the end result is always painful. We suffer physically, mentally and psychologically. Although all of us are very much cared for the world and its happenings, in a larger sense, but we lack compassion, feeling and congeniality and in the absence of the same, whatever we do, it is only a pretension. We only extend lip service. The brotherhood, which we show for others, does not arise out of compassion. It is just for the sake of it.  Someone, who does not have affection for himself, how can he understand the need of others and love them?  It is simply not feasible. Unless you do not know the art to love yourself, how will you curb the activities pertaining to violence at the slightest provocation. The roots of this paradox lie in the fact that we are not taught of the self-awareness from our childhood.  No doubt, we live in a federal society governed by democracy, but we are the believer of hedonistic culture where the denizens  succumb to the addiction of drugs, alcohols, tobacco and many other evil vices. Ultimately, the societal surroundings become higgledy-piggledy and there is an utter confusion and cultural shock prevails everywhere. 

The mind of the people becomes deranged and start to induce  violence, losing the proper identification. This leads us to a wrong psyche. The person then tortures himself with all types of malafide desires ignoring the positive aspects of self. He engages himself in all malicious activities with a malevolent intention. He gets self-pleasure doing this. Finally, he proceeds towards several dysfunctional behaviors. If parents, elders and even friends rebuke these types of persons for their obstructive actions, the same induces their hatred, jealousy feeling and insolvency.



: 2 :

Men are social animals. They prefer to remain in a society and fond of mixing with others to maintain conviviality. But when we lack the loving feelings for ourselves, a thinking of benign criticism evolves, which produces malignant rudeness.  It is true that we always want to remain in an ideal way.  We desire for an ideal image.  But most of us fail in this endeavour. The real self is not so grandeur that we believe or we think it should be.  This difference in perception escalates the self-hatred.  To avoid this and to sneak away from this environment, we pay our attention to frivolous issues to get a quick fix solution for all our impending problems.  But in this process, we ignore the larger value of lives.  From this point onwards, we become psychologically demurred and mostly, take part in violence. To get rid of this self-hatred, we must construct a store house in our mind, of course, exercising the simulation technique and  put more and more love therein. By doing this exercise, we can use love from this storage space and distribute to others showing compassion sincerely.
We have to arouse our self-awareness. Once it is developed, we can utilize the same to counter attack the wrong identifications of ours and save us from violence.  People must develop empathy for their body, mind and consciousness and define their needs. These needs are then to be balanced.  We should come out of the web of wrong and trivial issues and introspect its usefulness. We may cling to the one, which is mandatory discarding the others.  No sooner we will be able to reduce our being burdened with these wrong sensual issues, our self identification will be displayed prominently. Then we will be able to evaluate our real self, which is lying below the surface of intellectual integrity prevailing in everyone. People often give negative and sarcastic comments as the same are their behavioral ingredients. Those are deeply rooted in their subjectivity.  We have to assess these negative comments before reacting to the same. We have to keep our self image intact and we should not feel miserable and get bogged down by the various pressures of the environment.  Ultimately, when we realize who we are and what is our purpose, we will be able to love ourselves.

If every one of us is in the position to accept this hypothesis, is it not impossible for us to create an ideal society of non-violent atmosphere? So, the need is to utter the sentence of “I love myself” frequently. We must train ourselves to mumble this sentence and act accordingly. Unless you are habituated to visualize this, there is no sanctity in your saying “I love you.”  Why?  The reason is that, if you are able to bring this feeling of self- loving conceptually, you will love others with your mind and heart automatically. You need not to tell this sentence to show off.

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