The
art of forgiveness
When you involve in a quarrel, a bitter relationship starts,
and you or your opponent will find out an opportunity to humiliate each other.
Unless it happens, both the parties will not keep quiet. Why is it so? Because we believe in taking revenge rather
than follow the art of forgiveness. Like the art of living, it is also an art.
The more you can show forgiveness, the more you will be recognized by all. In our daily lives, we face some bad
experience, which is unavoidable. The two options are there when you meet bad
experience. Don’t think much and completely ignore the incident. If you are not able to bury the bad
experience, the intensity of the gloomily and unhappiness will increase. If you
prolong the altercations, then you are in a mood to take revenge. On the
contrary, if you ignore or show let go attitude, then you follow the art of
forgiveness. As per spirituality, showing forgiveness is a better option.
Forgiveness saves you from unwanted distraction, not
alluring you to involve in unproductive works and finally saves your precious
times. Further, you will be able to ensure not to escalate the issue, which may
otherwise develop extraordinary tension. This art is an instant solution to any
boisterous situation. Contrarily, if you
resort to the path of taking revenge, the problem will become complicated. Forgiveness may not give immediate solution
sometimes, but you get enough time to think deeply on the issue of quarreling. During this period, who knows either you or
your opponent may understand the situation thoroughly and bury the animosity
through discussions? When this type of
situation occurs, mostly people blame others. It is always advisable to examine
one’s role in the whole state of affairs.
For example, if you are gloomy, don’t focus on the other party. It is you, who are responsible for the
situation. A famous proverb says, “If you laugh, the whole world will laugh
with you, but if you weep, you have to shed tears alone.” You need to search out for a better option to
come out from any impasse.
In our lives, we face two choices. One is anti-other thinking, and another is
pro-self thinking. The anti-other thinking provokes you to the path of
animosity. You will be in a mood to argue with others, to oppose any suggestion
without analyzing the pros and cons of the issue, like to irritate others and
not allowing others to finish their words, and finally, you descend to the
brute level. The pro-self thinking makes
you reach a higher realm, where your behavior will be very rational and less
aggressive. The art of forgiveness is a full stop because thereafter you have
to start afresh. But the attitude to take revenge will bring peril to you;
otherwise, you cannot enjoy a quiet life. Further, forgiveness will increase
the chance to reduce bitterness, if not eliminated entirely, whereas revenge
will escalate the tension in a relationship. Forgiveness makes you think
positively uninterruptedly while hate fosters ill feelings and negativities.
And the negative thoughts will bring disharmony in your mental pattern. Many
people believe that forgiveness is a characteristic trait for a weak
person. It is advisable to take
tit-for-tat approach. But this approach
is not a solution to any problematic issue. Forgiveness closes any problem once
for all, whereas tit-for-tat attitude aggravates and prolongs it. Some people think that forgiveness will
provide an urge to continue with wrongdoings, but this thinking has no iota of
truth. In the long run, forgiveness
always wins the battle. In fact, history has also shown us this
proposition. Psychology shows us that we
are born with ego and a conscience. If
you adopt the policy of tit-for-tat, it creates resentment and inflates other
person’s ego, whereas if you follow the art of forgiveness, it will activate
the other person’s conscience. It is an established hypothesis that in any
controversial matter, the conscience always plays a decisive role. Forgiveness and revenge are two different moral
cultures. If you practice the forgiveness policy, you will be instrumental in
developing a clean, better and healthy society where positive values flourish
and the spirit of brotherhood are evident, and where groups join and turn the
nation into a peaceful entity. The outcome of revenge will bring just the
opposite. A hate culture produces
bitterness, hatred, jealousy and occasionally anarchy, which is not good for
human beings. In this culture, everyone wants to topple others, which creates
the growth of a not at all healthy environment.
We are bound to do something wrong in our lives. The common proverb “To err is human,” is
always to be in our conscience, but that does not mean taking revenge will be
the solution to an unresolved issue.
That will develop the tenacity to do mistake after mistake. Contrarily, when you take the path of
forgiving others, you correct the wrongs with rights. If err is human, forgiveness is more human.
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